His last breath

He rolled over, hugged her and took his last breath...

It is two am and I am in the bed lonely with my husband and all I can think about is Maria and her husband. She talked about him all the time and loved him dearly and on Thursday he rolled over, hugged her and took his last breath. I wonder if I will ever have a love like that. I lay here and wonder if one day I will die angry in my sleep not feeling like I was loved. I wish Maria could have her love back. I wish she could wake up tomorrow morning and tell her husband how much she loved him just one more time. She looks so sad now; she had so much joy before and now it looks like it was knocked right out of her. I wish I could ask her if she had days like these; if he ever made her sad if she ever felt all alone in the same bed. I wonder if they argued about stupid things like air in the house or washing out a dish. I wonder if they ever went to bed mad as hell over the little things. Its two am and I have a husband that i don't want next to me at all right now and I know wherever Maria is she wishes she would have hers back if only for one more night. It was as if his body knew it was going to leave here and he just wanted one more opportunity to tell her he was there and that he loved her. How long does it take to get to that point? Will some of us never get there? Will we get there Ang? Will we get the Diana? Will we get there Kitty? I feel such a pain in my chest. In the end I know Maria knows she was loved. Is it horrible for me to think that I wonder if I will ever really know?

Good night Maria. Thank you for loving hard and for letting us know that real love exists in this world. I pray that the Lord gives you peace in this time of loss and holds you close just like your husband did.